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Ali Clarke: The era of relentless cruelty

Why do some people go out of their way to be nasty to others they don’t know? After observing the hatred towards Cleo Smith’s parents, Ali Clarke explores the psychology of the online pile-on.

Feb 10, 2022, updated May 02, 2022
Photo: Yui Mok/PA Wire

Photo: Yui Mok/PA Wire

Damn, people can be mean.

I realise that’s a lesson everybody learns at some stage in life, but the level at which people can take time out of their day to be unkind still catches me by surprise.

This all came rushing home when I dipped my toe in the murky waters of Twitter and Facebook commentary while watching the Cleo Smith “tell-all” on 60 Minutes last Sunday night.

For those who missed what was the biggest story of last year, Cleo was the four-year-old girl who disappeared from a Western Australian campsite while her baby sister and parents slept beside her in their tent.

She was missing for two and a half weeks and I don’t think anyone – bar her parents – thought she’d be coming home alive.

But she did.

Thank God/whichever deity you might believe in – she did.

Some incredible police work meant they pulled her out of a strange home early in the morning on that 18th day for the little girl to utter the now-famous words while cradled in a policeman’s arms: “My name is Cleo.”

To most of us, it was a much-needed happy ending – giving us a break from the endless COVID drudge and allowing us to mentally cast the Disney movie with Chris Hemsworth and Margot Robbie as the devastated parents and Sam Neill as one of the unrelenting cops.

There was also the usual nasty social media speculation that the family MUST have had something to do with it. As mum Ellie used social media to actively keep up the search momentum, she was targeted.

Was it the $2 million “cheque” that pushed people over the line or is it, simply, that some of us just can’t choose positivity over negativity?

The moment the family took a rumoured $2 million to tell 60 Minutes their story, the abuse seemed to hit another level.

The ethics of ‘chequebook journalism’ have been debated since, well, we started writing and cashing cheques (I guess bank transfer journalism doesn’t quite roll off the tongue as well).

Opinions bounce between ‘why shouldn’t someone get money if a media giant is going to profit’, to once the cash is exchanged the temptation is for more flash.

While no one has suggested there’s been any embellishment in this particular story, the argument goes that payment can make people reach for a more exciting truth or at the very least, distort it.

The sophistication of determining the difference between a credible news outlet pushing public interest journalism versus a commercial one who wants to own the big stories is, I think, within the grasp of most of us.

Unfortunately, the over-simplification of social media amplifies those who do not and then gives a platform to anyone with a grudge.

These keyboard warriors took aim at mum’s weight, her story, at her lack of emotion. (What? Just like Lindy Chamberlain?)

They attacked the family’s decision to pack up, leave town and travel around the country.

Some said they should be ashamed, some said they were greedy, some called them disgusting and, incredibly, others said they were still behind it all even though Terence Darrell Kelly has pleaded guilty to a charge of child stealing and is currently awaiting sentencing.

Cleo Smith with her mum Ellie Smith, who has been subjected to online abuse. Photo: AAP/Richard Wainwright

Reading these comments, one after the other, I couldn’t feel anything other than gross. I struggle to understand why people would take time on their Sunday evening, presumably while sitting on their couch safely ensconced in their home, to put that negativity and crap out into the world.

I finally stopped reading when one punter wrote that the real reason the story was being aired was because it was a needed “good news story for police after police brutality across Australia” (insert eye-roll emoji here).

Was it the $2 million “cheque” that pushed people over the line or is it, simply, that some of us just can’t choose positivity over negativity?

Or perhaps, at the very least, is it that they just can’t keep their non-serving inner dialogue to themselves?

The psychology of it all is fascinating, if somewhat sad, and there are numerous theories about the psychological sources of our online meanness.

Some people are motivated by increasing their own self-worth and seek status in a world of fellow trolls who congratulate and support their efforts.

Others just feel better because they’re pulling someone else down and, while bullying has been around the schoolyard forever, the lack of physical connection with their target is enough to embolden people who normally wouldn’t dare say anything bad to another person’s face.

There’s also a school of thought that suggests that after repeatedly presenting our ‘best selves’ online – chasing the buzz of Facebook ‘likes’, for example – we establish an inflated sense of self and our boosted egos dent our self-control.

Whatever the reason, Sunday night TV shouldn’t be the flag fall for abuse and belittling and while, yes, I felt slightly uncomfortable considering the invaded privacy of a small girl, I would never dream of getting off my butt and writing about that online.

Ali Clarke presents the breakfast show on Mix 102.3. She will be a regular columnist for InDaily this year.

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