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An independent review of the last fortnight using (mostly Simpsons) gifs

Opinion

It’s been a hell of a fortnight for South Australia, with no shortage of anxiety and mixed messages. Once in a while, it’s worth lightening the mood a little – and sometimes the best way to make sense of it all is a quick recap, in (mostly Simpsons) gif form.

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Ok everyone, it’s been bad. And it’s still bad.

But we can’t let this whole Parafield cluster business keep us down.

It was Sunday last week that we first learned coronavirus had re-entered the SA community – likely, Chief Public Health Officer Nicola Spurrier argued, via surface transmission to a medi-hotel worker.

This put the spotlight on the medi-hotel system, as dozens of travellers were forced to extend their quarantine arrangements.

The cluster quickly approached 20. Naturally, everyone took this news very calmly.

The Sky Is Falling Reaction GIF

Then things went even more pear-shaped, as a simple takeaway pizza turned into a statewide nightmare.

Community Pizza Fire GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

Authorities acted swiftly, moving to lock down SA as other states quickly closed their borders.

Best Simpsons Dome GIFs | Gfycat

The lockdown – or ‘pause’, as the Government preferred it – would affect almost every person and every profession in the state.

At first, people working from home struggled to adjust to their new reality.

But they got into the swing of it after a few hours.

As for those whose work simply shut down, some pondered a few pleasant days of life in lockdown.

Homer Simpson Pool Day GIF - HomerSimpson PoolDay GIFs

But by the first afternoon, a more unpleasant reality set in:

Summer Pool GIF - Summer Pool Homer - Discover & Share GIFs

Particularly given, after the Victorian experience earlier this year, six days sounded like it could be just the beginning.

It certainly wouldn’t have been what Hollywood heartthrob Zac Efron had in mind when he jetted in to town a few days earlier.

Zac Efron Crying GIFs | Tenor

But frankly, it wasn’t what the rest of us had in mind either!

There was the predictable rush on shops and supermarkets, as people contemplated some basic essentials falling into short supply.

Those that missed out altogether were forced to make do.

And for the kids, it was even stranger.

Every school in SA closed down, leaving students stuck at home.

They were allowed into their own yards, but not to socialise with other children.

Milhouse Playing Alone - The Simpsons GIF - TheSimpsons Seesaw Milhouse - Discover & Share GIFs

By the end of day one, this was already proving problematic for many households.

Even dogs could not be walked, prompting some pent-up pooches.

But the biggest impact was on businesses, for many of which the lockdown wasn’t merely inconvenient but disastrous.

By Friday, we were collectively wondering if we hadn’t become – as we’d been told – too complacent about the whole COVID thing.

Ive Made A Huge Mistake GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

But then – another twist.

The Government revealed the lockdown would end early, after discovering it was sparked by inaccurate information.

Animated GIF

Actually, though – they weren’t sorry. Because it wasn’t their fault.

Instead, they did the only thing a responsible Government could do under the circumstances.

For it emerged that the guy who ordered pizza hadn’t just ordered pizza – he’d been working at the actual pizzeria!

This new information removed the basis on which the lockdown had been put in place, with the Government declaring they’d been profoundly misled by a Spaniard.

Fawlty Towers GIF - Fawlty Towers Fawltytowers GIFs

Premier Steven Marshall boldly declared the man had “lied” – branding his actions “completely unacceptable”.

By Friday evening, a surprise police taskforce was in place to look into everything the Spanish guy had said and done.

Inquisition Monty GIF - Inquisition Monty Python GIFs

As for the rest of us, we were soon free to emerge from lockdown. If we wanted to.

The people that had spent their entire Wednesday afternoon and evening in a supermarket queue probably allowed themselves a moment’s self-reflection.

I've made a huge mistake” – House Democrats - Congressional Leadership Fund

But not everyone was buying it. Liberal backbencher Nick McBride took his own leader to task, declaring the lockdown an avoidable “travesty” and lamenting a lack of “due diligence” by authorities – an assessment he claimed had prompted Marshall to give him “evil glares”.

Fmj GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

Marshall played down the rift, but it was clear there was no love lost.

Still, by early this week things were settling down again, and Spurrier declared the champagne was “on ice” – but not for long.

Fall Fail GIF by moodman

Two positive cases – a couple arrived from Nepal that had been assumed to have caught the virus overseas – were instead linked to the cluster.

They hadn’t caught it overseas – but in a Government-run medi-hotel.

Naturally, once again, South Australians took this news very calmly.

Authorities finally got round to reviewing CCTV from the Peppers hotel.

The daily COVID updates became fraught theatre, as the media probed authorities for answers – even if many viewers didn’t think much of their questions.

While the Government maintained they were simply giving journalists the truth.

Some of the online commenters even went so far as to declare the journalists should all be banned from the daily media conferences.

But one thing we have learned about COVID from the past fortnight is that it is, without doubt, a “sneaky virus”.

There was yet another twist though.

Just as things settled down again, an evening SA Health alert revealed a Woodville schoolgirl had returned a positive test – returning South Australians to their collective misery.

Just When I Thought I Was Out, They Pull Me Back In! - Godfather Part 3 GIF by D... | Gfycat

Spurrier patiently explained that the girl may have collected a pizza from the same outlet whose erroneous takeaway had shut down the state the previous week – but that this time such drastic action wouldn’t be necessary.

Instead, South Australians were simply told to don a face mask – an accessory unlikely to garner many fashion plaudits.

Hannibal Lecter Masks - Screen Tests from Silence of the Lambs - Album on Imgur

But at least we’re now looking at some easing of restrictions – with “vertical consumption” set to return after all these weeks of the horizontal kind.

And the Victorian border to finally re-open completely from next week.

So, after all that, we can now finally take a moment to ponder the fortnight just gone – a fortnight for which there is really only one appropriate response.

What The Hell Was That Smoking GIF - WhatTheHellWasThat Smoking Clown GIFs

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